The bad one
Release date: July 15, 2005
Director: Tim Burton
Who should watch this movie: People still obsessed with being “Edgy”
When should you watch this movie: When you just ate something poisonous and need to throw up
The sell: Sorry to everyone who for some reason is still a Johnny Depp fan. This movie is bad. First of all, the original Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory did not need a remake. We had all agreed that Gene Wilder was a genius and that Grandpa Joe is an evil sack of shit. We could have left it at that, but no, Tim Burton couldn’t leave things be. To make things worse, Burton completely misses the point of the original – A metaphor for the American Dream – and leans into the creepy darkness, losing any sense of whimsy along the way. Burton turns Wilder’s world of pure imagination into a nightmare and for what? There is nothing gratifying to take away here. Sure there was a sad attempt at giving Wonka a “dark backstory” but all that did was cheapen the effect of the whole production. I had nightmares about this movie for literal years.